In
undergrad, I had the opportunity to learn about children with varying abilities
and after completing a major project for the course, I realized that sometimes
we as humans, take these groups of people for granted and mistreat them without
realizing that our words and actions can hurt.
I am fortunate to work at a center who accepts all children and families
types, which has given me the opportunity to meet and interact with various types
of people. In one classroom, there is a little boy who has cerebral palsy and
he has a twin brother in another class. One day the children were outside and I
overheard another student say, “What’s wrong with him? He broke or something?” I immediately noticed that all the students’ on
the playground were laughing and cracking jokes and especially the twin
brother. I was confused. I immediately pulled all the students aside and
explained to them that their actions were mean and wrong, and very
hurtful. I was more hurt at the twin
brother because I imagined him coming to his brother’s rescue. I spoke his
parents later and learned that he was having a hard time coping with the idea
of not having a “normal” brother in his eyes.
From that day forward, I found it
increasingly helpful that I had information on various abilities to share with
the children to make them aware that it is important to be respectful and
accepting of all. I also encouraged the families to come in and speak to the
children, to give them a firsthand look at what it actually feels like to have
disability. I hope that by pulling the children aside that it showed them that
I care, that I respect all individuals, and that I wanted to share with the the
importance of being mindful of their actions.
Sha'Keema,
ReplyDeleteJust reading your post made me feel terribly for the boy in your story. Did you feel that after addressing some of the issues about respecting and recognizing differences that your students acted differently around the little boy? What about his brother? Has his behavior changed?
Sha'Keema,
ReplyDeleteYour story made me think of the director at my school who is also a family friend. She has 3 sons and the youngest was severely handicapped (this is how she describes him since they never had a diagnosis for his disability and the doctors felt he had multiple disabilities/handicaps). Now her sons are grown and her youngest son with the special needs passed away 2 and a half years ago due to health complications but her and her husband chose to place their youngest son in a special public school that only teaches students with special needs who need one on one or small group instruction. Many families in our area have mixed feelings about such a school and often times parents refuse to send their child to this school as they feel they are not being included even if this school would be helpful to their child. My director always tells anyone that they chose this school for two reasons: 1. to help their son as they felt this was the best placement for him and he did indeed flourish there and 2. for their other two sons so that they would not be put into the position to defend their brother everyday at school. Do not get me wrong the other two sons loved their brother and miss him everyday. In fact their life plan always included taking him into their homes if/when their parents were no longer able to care for him and they also wanted their brother to be the best man in their weddings. Additionally, all the brothers close friends accepted their younger brother into their group of friends as well. I think the older brothers chose friends who would help support them and would also accept their brother and look past his disabilities into the amazing person he was.
Maybe the family at your school would benefit from finding a support group for the brother with other children who have special needs siblings. I am sure it would benefit him throughout his life as well especially if he wants to be involved in the decisions regarding his brothers future in case he does end up assisting with his care.
Also, I often explain to my students that we are all different and what is easy for one student may not be easy for another student. By being having strengths and areas we are working to improve we are better able to work together and help one another since we all do not have the same strengths.
I enjoyed your blog. I appreciate how you to a hold of things and explained to these students how wrong it is to insult someone. It does not matter if they have a disease or not, it is wrong. Also, sharing this information with the parents and realizing that the twin brother had issues also helps. Often children do not know how to cope with things like this until they are a little older. You did an exceptional job.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your post. Sometimes it's hard to get young children to understand or to even empathize with someone who has a disability and/or is different from them. I think you handled it very well. Also, sometimes it may take you pointing out their weaknesses as well to really get them to see that concept. Of course, we don't WANT to point out their flaws (as not to cause even more discomfort in the classroom setting). However, getting them to realize their own weaknesses helps them to see that no one is perfect and that everyone has something about them that is not so great. Eventually they will understand as this also comes with age and maturity.
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